My God John, that was a GRUELLING match if ever I saw one! What a game tonight!
Yes Dave, I have to agree with you and every dreadball fan out there, that was pure gold for the neutral viewer. Sure, the TNMT fans won’t be as thrilled as everyone else, but who cares what a bunch of turtle-lovers want!
Now now John, let’s be fair here. They played a good match, and their strategy of hiring the mysterious ‘number 88’ for their game against the Steelers earned them a point in the league.
Yeah alright. I guess I’m still a little mad at them for beating the Oakland Maidens last season. I’m sorry.
Sorry my ass John. They can’t help it if you bet all your money on a team of girl pirates. That might just be your dumb mistake…
Indeeeeed it might have been Dave. urhm. The game. Yes. Well. Apparently it was an exiting game.
Right. I’m sorry, back to business sportsfans! If you haven’t seen it, here’s the lowdown: The Steelers got an early lead with nice 3-point score in the first rush, and the TNMT struggled to recover from that the whole game. The Steelers kept up the pressure with constant scoring while the lone number 88 tried to keep pace on the Steeler side of the pitch.
Yeah, if it hadn’t been for the mysterious MVP it would have been over before rush 7. The rest of the turtles did their utmost to take out the opposing strikers, but both Shimizu and Vaidosa proved hard targets for the Terratons.
Remember John, the TNMT are a young team of teenagers, and often they lack the finesse and skill of a more experienced team. One of the first slams of the game was viewed as a Sucker Punch foul by the refbot, and the offending guard was red-carted off the field. A blow to the team, and the other Terraton guards held back on their slams the rest of the game.
The game would have been a lot more even if they hadn’t, Dave. If only they had managed to take out some of the Steeler strikers, they could have pushed on to a victory. Unfortunately for them, the only player who didn’t hold back this match was all-star favorite of the Steelers: John Dwayneson! Man that guy can kick ass. First slam he makes he takes out that TNMT guard with surgical precision.
Surgical indeed John, did I see it correctly that he ripped part of that Terratons spine out by pulling his tail off? Brutal. And he’ll go down in the annals as one of the few humans to take out two Terratons in one match. After last nights match I even thought I heard a glimmer of respect in Buzzcuts commentary, and he normally has nothing but scorn for other guards.
But besides the bloodshed, there was plenty of other action to witness folks. Highlight of the game for me was the amazing ‘pin-ball-machine’ score by Steeler striker Shimizu in rush 9. Amazing, just amazing. The ball bounced off the scoring ring, into the wall, off the shoulder of a Terraton jack and then again off the opposite wall and right back at Shimizu. He sees it coming and somehow rams it towards the scoring ring again, and it goes in! Weirdest pin-ball score I’ve every seen Dave!
Wow, yeah, that goal really got me on my feet John. But I think my personal man of the match was number 88. His consistency in scoring, without any support, was just amazing. Goal after goal after goal. A true one-man-army that man/alien/thing.
Dave, I think you’re right, but the most fun part for me might have been watching the Steeler coach, Ernie Stautner. He was red-faced and screaming from rush one right up untill the end.
Can’t believe the lungs on that man. For a guy that small he sure can scream John. But you’re right, he was all over the place. “Offense! OFFENSE! no wait, DEFENSE, watch your back Ronnie! And SCORE hotdamnyou! Defend the strike zone and ATTACK”. No wonder his players stopped listening to him after rush 4. There was no strategy there. None.
No there wasn’t any strategy. Stautner was clearly thrown off his game by the arrival of number 88. He just didn’t know how to handle it. But a 5-0 score at the end of the game must make him a little happy, even if it was down to some lucky moments in the Steelers favor.
Well John, I can’t say it enough. Even the best teams need luck on their side if they want to win. And that’s all for tonight folks, join us later for some clips off Ernie Stautner screaming his head off, and the amazing moment when Dwayne Johnsons head got bashed in by a Terraton and he had to get medical treatment. And all the game-bloopers you want off course.
This is Dave and John, signing off for now! Good evening!